Monday, February 16, 2009


Fun outside last week.

Climbing on the snow drifts.

Date Night

Sorry the picture is a tad blurry. The kids have taken a liking to my camera and there must have been a finger print on the lens. Silly kids! So, Daddy and I had a date on Saturday evening. We ended up at Max and Erma's. Not our first choice, but there were a ton of people out and about Saturday (it was like 45 degrees outside). We realized that we haven't been out on a weekend in a while and week nights are much easier to get out and not have to wait! But, it was a great time. We got to talk and just connect in a way we don't when the kids are our first priority. Before we left, Baylor was crying and so upset. I felt bad leaving, but he was tired and had a cough for a week or so, and as soon as we were gone, he was done crying.

As for the kids, they are so active and busy. They were almost crying because they wanted to go outside so bad! I took them out and it was so nice. It was still only 35 degrees, but it felt nice and crisp. The kids walked on the tall snow drifts we still have left, we threw the ball to the dogs and they ran around, rode bikes and pushed the mowers around. We were probably outside for 40 minutes! I took a couple of pics (see above). We have been going to swimming lessons again. We have lessons (refreshers) this week and last week too. Averie loves them, but Baylor is anxious. He was so small when he was in them before and didn't really "get" the whole swim, float, swim concept. Today was the first day of the second week and he went and didn't cry! He was in his float and could flip to swim and get Miss Cindy's hand! And then float again. All without tears! YAY!! His confidence must have gotten a boost last week. They are both doing so well. Averie is learning the backstroke. She already swims to the bar and to Miss Cindy and back...she is a fish!

So, today I started exercising again! And we bought a treadmill! It has been a few weeks since I've done any exercising since I (we) went through a pretty emotional week the end of January. We also had a Dr. appt with a fertility specialist last week too. The process of expanding our family has not been as easy as it was when Averie and Baylor came along. And I never dreamed it would take as long as it has. After we had a break cycle over the holidays, we decided to make an appt. with a fertility specialist and proceed with a "newer" drug called femara (tried clomid for several cycles over the summer/fall). The femara basically tricks your brain in a different way then clomid. And it worked, 1st cycle. I ended up pregnant, but had a very early miscarriage a week after I found out. We had already made the appointment with the fertility office, so we went and met with the Dr. and discovered that we do have a mild form of secondary infertility (or I do more specifically). My eggs are not growing fast enough, meaning they are not "great" for fertilization when I do ovulate. So, we will be trying femara again, since it made my eggs grow faster, like they should. After this appointment, I was also diagnosed with MTHFR by some blood work my ob's office did after the miscarriage. I am on medication (basically extra vitamins) now, and that should be what my body needs to reduce my risk of having another miscarriage. I hope it works...I can honestly say bringing my babies into this world were best days of my life. Losing one, well, was the worst.

Sorry for the super in depth post. I've been really wanting to post all of that. Not only for my own vent, but for the kids. Someday they will want to know (maybe) what we go through for our family. I love my children so much and would do anything for them. Averie and Baylor are true blessings and I would never want anything different than them. Yet, at the risk of sounding selfish, I just know deep down in my heart that we aren't done expanding our family. I truly believe we will be blessed again, all in good time. I hold on to that hope everyday.


Shawna said...

You are not sounding selfish at all for wanting/needing/desiring more children! Trust me, I know...we are of course grateful for our two healthy children, but that desire for more is always present. You are a great mom and I know God will bless you with a third, and fourth, and possibly a fifth, he he he! Love the date pic too, you hot mama!

BuckeyeBundle said...

Oh Beth! I'm so sorry for the struggle and wanted to say that I can unfortunately relate. I don't wish infertility on anyone. It is such a trying and difficult time for all involved. Just know that I will be thinking and praying for you guys. If you need to talk or vent, give me a call. I've had 2 miscarriages myself and obviously have gone done the road you are stepping onto. Not that I am the expert by any means or know how YOU feel, but just wanted you to know that I am here to listen and support you and understand that it's not always the easiest thing to go through.
Love ya!

PS...if you survived Clomid, the rest may seem like a least for me. clomid made me crazy!

Chasity said...

Beth...First great picture of you and Matt!!! Secondly great job to Averie and Baylor swimming!! I wish we had those around here!!! Thirdly it stinks that you've had such a touch route and long way to go!! I truly believe that your month will be here soon!! I cannot wait until your posting belly pictures and in the 9 month stretch! BTW your not selfish at all!!

Served Averie fresh milk for 1 year, 2 months and 5 days! Served Baylor fresh milk for 1 year, 6 months, 1 week and 5 days! Served Colbie fresh milk for 1 year, 3 months exactly!